“The greatness comes not when things go always good for you. But the greatness comes when you’re really tested, when you take some knocks, some disappointments, when sadness comes. Because only if you’ve been in the deepest valley can you ever know how magnificent it is to be on the highest mountain.” ~ Richard Nixon
Being a member of the male species, I am aware of the fact that men who groom themselves well, even when they have nowhere to go, can be seen as ‘high maintenance’ or ‘assholes’. You may ask yourself “Is it necessary for a man to wear nice clothes meant for stepping out, even if he has nowhere to go or no one to impress?” It is part of taking yourself seriously. What does this have to do with meeting new people some of you may ask? Everything!
One of the main reasons why I prefer to stay single is for the simple fact that I know innately (along with lots of worldwide evidence) that you are free to come and go as you please (like rolling stones or leaves on the ground). Meeting new people causes single men and women to step themselves up. What I mean by this is that once you meet new people and those persons are those who you either find intriguing or desiring to want to join their inner circles or sleep with them, this makes you upgrade your own vanity, intellectual capacity and take better care of yourselves in various ways.
When I visit escorts or even when I go on dates with vanilla women or go to sports bars for happy hour, knowing that I may have a successful encounter, I groom myself and make sure that I am looking my best. This is not done for the sole purpose of egotistical gratification. The reality is that aside from the fact that you never know who you may run into publicly, you attract who you are.
This is far superior, more engaging and healthier than monogamous counterparts who allow themselves to be too comfortable, drunk off “love” and letting themselves go. Our elders, parents, tabloid/news junkies and authoritarian figures who want so badly to control our lives would never figure this out and I will not waste my time slandering them. So, this is why I do not believe in happily ever after, “The Disney Myth” and other assorted, shitty fairy tales. As author of Insatiable Wives, David J. Ley, said in other words, “The Disney Myth” is a widely believed myth perpetuated by media and defenders of marriage that if you find the right person, then it’s happily ever after. Clearly, happily ever after turns out to be a lie if you ever find yourself attracted to other people (be it sexually, emotionally, aesthetically or even intellectually). I will offer a few examples:
1. Due to my being single, whenever I meet a woman in public or via social networks (vanilla or an escort), whether sex is involved or not, before I meet her, I spend about an hour grooming, shaving and dressing up before I go en route to visit her. Weeks in advance before I visit escorts, I work on my PC muscles several times daily so that my stamina will increase. Hell, I even put together sensual playlists on my smartphone to play during my sexual encounters. Even when I attend sports bars to drink and watch sports games or shop, I groom myself the same exact way. If I were married, I would not be able to do those things as, for one, I have become too comfortable. For two, I would probably not have time due to work/career schedules, in addition to time spent catering to a wife and bratty children. I am reminded of my mother asking me “Whoever you are hooking up with, is she worth you spending an hour shaving and dressing up for?” I discover that these are questions people ask when they have been used, gamed on or once they have given up on life and, more importantly, themselves.
2. I know a woman who was married to her husband for ten years at the time. They have two children and while the wife started to become slightly overweight, the husband began to lose interest. While he knew innately that the wife-and-kids routine was not for him, he started stepping out every other weekend to meet different women via nightclubs for sexual gratification. This is when he started carrying himself differently (wearing suits, frequenting sex toy shops, spending hours in his bathroom to prepare for a night on the town). The wife, however, started to become intellectually attracted to a local DJ for a radio station who was also an intellectual who wrote books about epistemology and anthropology. Though the wife had no sexual desire for the DJ/author, the husband became increasingly jealous, for some odd reason. The wife eventually started stepping out, which led the two to divorce and live happily ever after, without eachother. Only one person continues to step their A-game up to date.
3. A married couple has a daughter. The husband is monogamous, traditional, family-oriented and hardworking, but he is also a collector of movie memorabilia and such. The wife tries to work it out, but found herself attracted to a personal trainer who trains her at a local gym. She then realizes she is missing out on a lot of the finer things in life, due to her loyalty as a wife. Bored with her fat, nerdy husband, she winds up stepping out on her husband, having illicit and raunchy sexual encounters with the personal trainer, doing freaky sexual acts with the other man that she will not do with her husband – primarily because he is overweight, boring, stern and too traditional to the point to where he does not allow her to drink alcohol or smoke cigarettes. The husband is unaware of this until two years after the fact that she has cheated, got pregnant by the personal trainer and had an abortion to hide it from him. Her sisters knew it for years and never told the husband until she got into very dramatic and violent altercations with her lover, which oddly involved the couple’s daughter (she would take her daughter to visit her health-fanatic lover). The husband remarried and he became even more of a bore with his health declining severely. The newly-divorced woman has her share of dick from various men. However, her health also declined after she temporarily stepped herself up for a man who she fell madly in love with, who wanted nothing to do with her, even though he inseminated her.
4. A single man who is well past 50 years of age spends him spare time being involved in his sons’ lives and traveling the world with friends and family. He hardly looks 50 and he meets various people amid his travels, which includes young ladies in their 20s and 30s who he bangs. You think he could pull this off if he was in a traditional marriage? Unless the wife is okay with her husband stepping out and they were in an open marriage…
Being single causes any person to focus on themselves so much more and they take better care of their health than their married counterparts.