Escort Etiquette – III: The Ten Mongering Commandments

933671-120630-twam-escortI’ve been reluctant to write this for a long time and at first, I was not going to create a post about how to use escorts because Advocatus Diaboli wrote his and I didn’t want it to seem as if I was copying him. But the reality is that he is his own man and so am I. That said, he has his own experiences and preferences and I have mine. Essentially, most of what he has written is absolutely right. When it comes to escorts, there are guidelines that should be followed, especially if you as a man want to have a small family of amazingly beautiful women who you bang on a regular basis. More importantly, there are rules that should be carefully embraced due to the USA being “a sex prison country”. One important rule is to cover your tracks and keep your mouth shut!

Being a male, I understand that some guys are braggarts amongst their brethren and they enjoy sharing their sexual conquests with a chosen few. I also understand that a few guys may congratulate you and say “Kudos to high standards!” They may idolize you, but even male friends fall out due to mediocre pussy, careers or innocuous errors. How are you for sure that they may not turn on you and air out your dirty laundry, especially in a misanderic society where men degrade and screw over their own brothers-in-arms over a piece of ass? There is a saying that goes “The loudest in the room is the weakest in the room”. Do not forget that!

Before I continue, I want to point out for the guys who are unaware of the difference between escorts and other females in the paid-sex arena that escorts (and handfuls of strippers) are classy, while streetwalkers and most massage parlor chicks are trashy. Escorts are high-paid, high-value females who look better than your average televised supermodel. These are the women who men of power and prestige get caught up with… like the Elliot Spitzers, the Charlie Sheens, the Tiger Woods’, the Silvio Berlusconis, doctors, lawyers, judges, business owners, athletes, politicians, etc. High-end people. It’s like comparing Viktor & Rolf and Paco Carabone colognes/perfumes to cheap-ass celebrity fragrances sold at Wal-Mart and Rite Aid by Michael Jordan, Tim McGraw, J. Lo, etc.

So, here’s my ten commandments list, but in no particular order:

1. Wash Your Body – As a male, you need to understand that you stink more and in ways you may be unaware of. As humans, we have natural scents that we are immune to because we are accustomed to our own bodies and environments. This goes for men and women alike (which is why high-end men and women – including South American chicks – take 2-3 showers daily, especially during the hot summer months). Before your appointment, try to rid your body of any toxins beforehand and always wash your body. Though some escorts do not think of it as a big deal, the high-value ones always think of it as a big deal. To these females, there is nothing worse than a hairy, flabby bastard who reeks of body odor with his dick and armpits smelling like potato bread or hummus dip.

2. Do Your Research – Doing your research involves a number of things. For one, find an internet review board and read the reviews. Beware of fake reviews and reviewers who pedestal mediocre females. Use Google search for phone numbers and photos. This can help you find more information about the lady and it can also help you discover if she’s real, fake or a bait-and-switch (as long as you’re smart enough to put 2 + 2 together). This protects you from scam artists, including bitches who may scam you and persons using photos of various ladies to lure you in and waste your time. Attracted to a lady who has no reviews? Proceed at your own risk. I am not responsible if you get into any mischief! Use your brain before you take the plunge and at all times, study the incall location/jurisdiction before attempting to visit the ladies. This protects you from ghetto hellholes, dope-boy gangsters, “law and order” infested towns and being caught up in the wrong place at the wrong time.

3. Avoid Streetwalkers and Asian Massage Parlors – Without regurgitating what Advocatus Diaboli has mentioned previously, I just want to add that unfortunately, these women have found their way into the interwebs to avoid persecution and I mentioned that here. These lowlife ‘victims of circumstances’ are generally controlled by pimps, drugs and governmental assistance. The difference between an escort and a streetwalker is that escorts have higher-costs, have indoor practices and enjoy their line of work or need money to pay for medical school or to pay her car bills. Streetwalkers have psychological problems, untreated STDs and do not enjoy their profession and do so to support drug habits. Most people who patronize streetwalkers and massage parlors are the thirsty, bottom-of-the-barrel guys, which includes dingy blue-collar guys and the neighborhood dope-boy gangsters. Don’t fuck with them!

In regards to Asian Massage Parlors, they are very easy targets for sting operations for the fact that they are open to the general public, plus permanent locations and even simple word-of-mouth. I have never visited one and do not intend to, even though I am attracted to Asian women. Most females in that line of work are attitudinal, old, wrinkled hags who look worse than white suburbanite cougars and are FOBs (Fresh Off the Boat) who are clueless about how things work in the USA.

4. How to Recognize Hookers From Escorts – Hookers usually have drug problems so massive to where if you read between the lines, you can see it in their eyes and notice their damaged, cellulite-laced skin with nasty bruises and marks on them. These scum wear the most tackiest, skimpiest wardrobe and they either look like your average, ghetto babymama or zoned-out groupies at Marilyn Manson and Courtney Love concerts. In some cases, it may not be noticeable because some of them use outdated photos and do not bother to post updated photos of themselves. If you’re a man who gets around, you can tell by how mediocre or ratchet she presents herself. Another instance is if she looks much older than she really is. Always trust your instincts and read between the lines. Street hookers take their money and give it straight to the local dopeman. Escorts (like strippers and sugar-babies) take the money to pay for medical school, travel, apartments/houses, cars, clothes, cosmetic surgery or to support a family.

5. Avoid Gossip – There is nothing wrong with developing strong relationships with your favorite ladies. While some escorts engage in conversation with clients (providing she enjoys their company and the client is not socially inept), understand that there are certain topics that you should never discuss with them. This includes – but not limited to – politics, potions and gossip about other providers, which includes devaluing a shitty provider you may have seen in the past. While some providers may side-in and agree with you at the time, she may be patronizing you. Keep in mind that in certain cities and towns, certain providers may know eachother on a platonic level and the word can always get out somehow, unless the provider you are seeing has personal beefs with other providers who you are throwing under the bus to her. In short, refrain from talking too much. This can get your ass blacklisted.

6. How to Use Performance Enhancers – Some men have no need for PDE5 inhibitor drugs. Some do. This could be due to some light psychological issues (such as anxiety, stress, OCD, ADD, etc.), episodes of chronic masturbation (which kills sex for men and women), poor diet, psychiatric medications, obesity, high blood pressure, drugs and alcohol, etc. This is where PDE5 inhibitor (performance enhancer) drugs come in. Even some men who have no need for them choose to take them for their own personal reasons. It is very disrespectful and a waste of these ladies’ time to visit them and you have no stamina. That said, it’s better to have and need than to need and not have. Contact your physician and see whether or not it is right for you. They are absolutely not suitable for persons with heart conditions and high blood pressure. Take them on an empty stomach and an hour before your encounter. Never take these with any other supplements, nor the same day you have consumed fatty meals, excessive alcohol and grapefruit juice!

7. Always Use Condoms – Always use condoms. Even if you’ve had a vasectomy, understand that it’s one thing to impregnate a lady, but another to catch permanent or temporary STDs. Granted, some escorts may have unprotected sex with several clients in the past for whatever reason. That said, even if she gets tested regularly like women in the porn industry (once every 1-6 months), she may not inform you if she happens to have an STD for various reasons. Do not use your mouth on just anyone. Like to dine out? Use dental dams, unless you are for sure she is not only disease free and hygienically correct and only if she is worth it. Even for regular casual sex encounters, how many people are stupid enough to go raw-dog in someone who they have not been acquainted with for more than several months?!

8. Read Her Body Language – Upon visitation, reading your partner’s body language is just as vital as if you were on a regular, vanilla date. Some providers understand the art of faking it while others are more sincere and genuine when it comes to their receptivity to orgasms, whether you are capable of providing her with one or not. Some ladies have no etiquette during appointments and I have had experiences with some dizzy-ass chicks who play with their smartphones and iPads during an encounter, or their phones ring consistently due to them simply not powering their devices off during an appointment. Not only is this unprofessional, but it can cause dizzy ones to stop in the middle of an encounter or to abruptly end an encounter because their phones ring out of control. Also, listen to how she communicates with you via phone. If she sounds as if she’s burned-out or lacking in enthusiasm, be very skeptical. In regards to escorts’ reluctance towards black men, I have discussed this before. Some providers will advertise ‘no black men’ or ‘no black men under 35+’, but few of them will make exceptions. This depends on the man’s approach and if he isn’t too rough with her, she may be happy to have him repeat with her.

9. Purchase a Pay-And-Talk Phone For Escort-Related Business – Once, I had a black AA escort disrespect me via text for no reason and I blocked her number. She calls me from another phone number after discovering that I blocked her ass, only to leave even more vulgar voicemail messages. Fortunately, I contacted her via my disposable pay-and-talk hobby phone and knew in advance that she in particular was not worthy of knowing my more personal info. After seeing an escort – given that we both appreciated eachother’s business/company and that she was repeat-worthy – then I would contact her from my personal phone and we’d even contact eachother via Facebook and become even more personally acquainted. Plus, it protects you from the few shady and scatterbrained characters that you might meet.

10. Tips & Other Etiquette – Providing your lady’s carnal and aesthetic performance is to your standards or higher and she’s worthy of repeating, please tip her and tip her well! You can tip her with money, drinks or snacks or you can lavish her with a gift from time to time, which includes a gift card to a department store or a piece of elegant lingerie from an adult novelties store. In regards to other etiquette, remember: If you live in a part of town that has a ‘zero tolerance’ for pooning and mongering, relocate or visit a provider who does not conduct business in that side of town. Your other and more superior option would be to travel abroad in select non-western countries. I won’t say where, but again, do your research. Also, do not fall in love. Never discuss freebies or try to low-ball (talk down on prices) and do not flatter them every time you see them. They will assume you are not used to anything and will eventually avoid you. This can also get your ass blacklisted, especially in a time where women clown, exploit and make examples out of men who kiss their asses!

There are other commandments that should be created and strictly followed, but I chose to limit mine to ten. Understand this, gentlemen: You may not be lucky or fortunate enough to have it like me. I have visited some ladies at their siblings’ homes, their own homes and apartments and I have even had a few contact me out of the blue just to converse and even have very few as friends on my social network pages (I had blocked one for being a complete silly fucking airhead and ‘accidentally’ posting screenshots of the contacts list in her smartphone, which revealed some of her clients’ phone numbers on her page). Also note that just because you spot a 5, does not imply the action will be great or if any occurs at all. Looks can be deceiving. Which reminds me of one guy I know, who visited a 5; a Hawaiian Black girl who resembled a mixture of M.I.A. and a younger Pam Grier who had him jumped and robbed with the use of a deadly weapon and bought a $2,000 plasma TV with his credit card at a Best Buy.

I hate bragging, but since my discovery in the Summer of 2013 (my second summer of lust), I have had nothing but mystifying encounters with amazing mulattos in my neck of the woods. Natalie J. and Brandy always made me come to the truth that there is no room for mediocre. Last time I saw Natalie J., I’m taking the action from the bedroom to the bathroom, bending her ass over the bathroom tub, the sink and even drilling her on a pristine toilet bowl while my iPod blares lovemaking music from The Weeknd. I showered after a bench-press session at the gym and went to see her… the sex was so good and lengthy, I’m sweating all over her, which made me feel like a real asshole!

Okay, I’ve gone through enough details and I’ve gotten personal enough. I’ll also add that depending on which agency you use, you’ll most likely find hard 4s, 5s and even a few 3s you may enjoy. Without saying which one, one agency only had 20% of females worthy of my attention. As long as you find the right ladies, cover your tracks and be discreet, you will have nothing but gusty-but-gratifying experiences.

Here are other parts of my Escort Etiquette series:

Escort Etiquette – I: Are Escorts Racist Against Black Men?

Escort Etiquette – II: Where Have All the Angels Gone?

1 Comment

  1. Nice post
    Couple questions….

    1) Do you only use agencies or do you also use Craigslist, adultsearch, backpage, etc?

    2) Why do you feel it’s direspectful to have no stamina? They get paid either way rite? Even if Intercourse isn’t involved (companionship, handjob, massage, what have you)? Not to say I would disrespect them

    In response to the first question, mentioning here is risky. The second question: Why waste any woman’s time if your sex is awful? Yes, most are in it only for the financial aspect. While some men only care about their own pleasure and avoid a woman’s pleasure, I’m cut from a different cloth. Some women do find it repulsive if the sex isn’t good, even if something is in exchange for it. Also remember, women love to talk a lot. That’s my own perspective, because I’m not a “selfish lover”. LOL

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